Why no more romantic symphonies are written

For grand orchestra and stretched gut kitten

Where are the composers of platonic love

Of music that made me dance with a dove

In flight with woodwinds, violins and a piano

Of glorious melodies full of tempting tempo

Rhythms of the magic heart without Wicked

Nor any of the clichéd musicals addicted 

Like awful Cats, hidden Phantom down the Opera 

Sunset Boulevards, Evitas and a dumb Cinderella

Technicolour dream-coats gone bonkers

Noise sausage for elevated knuckle-draggers

Loud beat from dead Neanderthal skull-drums

Degraded Punk, Pop and Beatles bums

Nor serious notations with necessary discord

That no respected musician really should afford

Interminable repeats and absent counterpoints

Sad dudes who decompose with darkening tones

For wars, depressions and dangerous drones

Schoenberg and his grating Pierrot Lunaire

Far from poor Percy Grainger’s Country Fair

Or Molly on the Shore

Which is a bit of a bore

No, we need more Swan Lakes and Nutcrackers

Felix Mendelssohn’s flutes plus some Richard Wagner’s

We don’t want singing voices like tortured rats

No Messiaen's apocalypse caught in German traps

WHILE

Yehudi Menuhin plays for an angel heavenly piss 

AND

Netanyahu kills humans with a frightful hellish kiss

ROBERT URBANOSKI — 21 DECEMBER 2024