Monday 23rd of December 2024

ken ham and the two be two...

noah

As American Christianity is feeling the pinch and declining rapidly like that of Europe, especially the Anglicanism of England, some of its leaders and thinkers are contemplating ways to fend off secularism. Either fight back or hold on to a firm position, behind a moat of inward Benedict Option. It's not a retreat but a strong affirmation circle of what is believed. Excellent.

Russell Moore’s sermon on Sunday night was incredible. An excerpt:

“If you frantically feel as though you are losing; if you frantically feel as though the culture is leaving you behind, then the problem is that we will become just like the culture that we are critiquing: who’s up, and who’s down, and who’s in charge, and who’s not. God is not surprised by whatever is happening right now in the world around you, in your community, or in the world at large. And maybe God is interested right now not so much in getting America in line with the church, as God is interested in getting the church out of step with America. He says to His disciples, ‘You are different. You have a distinctive calling. You have a distinctive witness. You have a distinctive future. We have a different way.’”

 

Here we cannot fault the desire to survive in the hand of god, separately from the secular riffraff. "Incredible" (sermon) of course is the wrong word — because let's face it: it is incredible in the true sense of the word, meaning you cannot trust it nor believe in it. I guess the author meant "fantastic" in some sense, but this word still holds some allusions to phantasm and fairly tales in its original varied meanings, including grotesque. 

And correct: god does not want America to fall in line with the church — or does He?... The task, even for Him, would be too difficult considering the idiots, ratbags, bigots, philistines and gun-toters living there. 

Well, with all the warring and killings going on, like in a Mother Courage and Her Children redux in the name of commerce, the CONservative hypocrisy — which want to kickass and punch the contrariant science in the gonads — is pushing religious credibility beyond the pale. Even the Pope knows that...

So I suppose Christians need to re-illustrate the beliefs in the almighty with more powerful suggestive reconstruction of events bigger than Ben-Hur and more set-inspiring than the Ten Commandments epics Hollywood has produced so far.

This is where we enter the kingdom of creationism... We must admit here that creationists are not hypocrites — they strongly believe in the wrong premises with dedicated vigour and without compromise unlike many other Christian do — as scientific knowledge goes in leaps and bonds against the interpretations of the biblical floods. 

Too many Christians, in their desire to reconcile the irreconcilable adopt science and its time frames with a certain mixed heart for the workings of this planet and god becomes a detached entity from it, only present in moral constructs... 

For the creationists, there is no such compromise:


Ken Ham Warns Culture Is Following Miley Cyrus and 'Sexual Perversion' After Pop Star Calls Belief in Noah's Ark [fucking] 'Insane'

Ken Ham Pushes Back Against Christian NASA Astronauts' Claims That Believers Can Accept Evolution; Argues Billions-Years-Old Universe Is 'Incompatible With Bible'

Ken Ham is the bloke (a bloke, not a guy — he is an Australian) who is recreating Noah's Ark somewhere... God told him to destroy a forest. He is funded by his followers — creationists and crack-pots, though they could be one and the same... Noah's Ark, of course, is a centrepiece in the beliefs of the Abrahamic religions, like the burning bush. It could explain why we don't see Dinosaurs in Central Park, New York. Noah may have had to make some hard choices of course. It was the mozzies or the Brontosauruses on the gangplank... 
But is it possible that god had experimented with the big beasts and realised he had made a mistake beforehand and killed them off, knowing Noah would have a mega problem on his hands later on? Dinosaur poop everywhere would not have been a good look said the cat on the deck. But god may have thought that dinosaur poop was a tremendous fertiliser for the garden of Eden... 
We all know that getting healthy plants is all in the preparation of the soil with compost and dung... And of course the Noah family became inbred like the Neanderthals would have been, had they not interbred with the superior species of the chosen people...
Miley Cyrus is a clever girl... Belief in Noah's Ark is insane... 
Though it is quite possible that a 5-foot tall Greek fellow and his family once built a barge large enough to accommodate some horny beasts from his herds and a few dogs — like they do on some high altitude lakes in South America — and ended up near Mount Parnassus after a big flood in Macedonia — a global warming flood that swallowed Atlantis. 
By the end of forty days and forty nights included, possibly more like four centuries, Noah would have needed a large broom to de-poop the barge and the place would have been reeking like a concentrate of wild menagerie at the zoo... Of course the brave man would have planned enough hay for the herbivorous lot... From time to time, Noah (or I believe his real name was Surgrapus Nemo of Nautilus) killed a sheep as a sacrifice to the god of Lagrandeboofus and fed his family and the dogs. Then, as Surgrapus' ship landed on Mount Parnassus, the fiesta began, as the mount was well-known for its glorious vines. The rest is insane history for insane believers or a crazy legend should you be sane of mind and body... 
And Ken Ham is correct: the theory of evolution is "INCOMPATIBLE with the bible". This has been my beef all along. The next step is which side do you "believe"? 
The bible is full of the abominable trials, the errors, the lies, the deceits, the machinations, the insanity, the concubines, the robberies, the sins and the wars between humans dedicated to a bearded fellow in the clouds above a flat earth, while evolution treats us barely above the rank of monkeys without a tail... 
Piece of cake:  We have to pick the bible as THE TRUTH.  The bible compares favourably to humanity today:  the trials, the errors, the lies, the deceits, the machinations, the insanity, the concubines, the robberies, the weather and the wars... and the flat earth... Spot on, Charlie ! We wuz made from mud and spittle as is, not evolved from failed dinosaur stock nor from creatures looking like rats. And we've all got this sticker on the forehead that says "ORIGINAL SIN"...
But what about the excellent commerce? Imagine there are about 1.5 billion Christians around the world. Most of them would have heard about Noah's ark... It's in the bible in black and white, sometimes shown within churches with illustration of a storm in which the barge is tossed around by the rising waters designed by god to get rid of the baddies (bad humans). Santa Claus is not very far at the north pole waiting his turn to deliver presents to the goodies (good humans). But should half of these believers hear about the Ark being reconstructed with a souvenir-selling concrete mall, one could be tempted to part with some tax deductible cash. 
One could soon become richer than Bill Gates in just a few seasons, even at ten bucks per donation.
So here we are, as progressive Christians get mixed up, as most Christians CONservatives in the US and in Australia denigrate sciences — the creationists led by an Aussie show how it's done without killing anyone. Meanwhile the Pope, the grand Doodah of Christianity, places his big shoes in the middle of the debate of global warming... Boom !
Is the pope Catholic? Sure. But where does he fit on the spectrum of Christianity?
I have no idea but now he has a few rebellious sheep in his flock. At least Ken Ham gives us hope that the sea level will rise again... except his boat is not big enough to accommodate two of everything including transgenders, gays, lesbians and variously frocked ecumenicals... It will be a tough choice to load the barge unless Ken uses plaster casts of sheep or animatrons of beavers. Live beavers could start cutting major struts or make a hole in the hull and this would be disastrous. Wood-worms would be annoying as well. So Gus recommends no wombats. What about snakes? Pretty bad history in the bible. Snakes reek of the devil and of deceit... but snakes are entitled to the benefit of the doubt, aren't they? 
Is there a third referee to adjudicate on this?... Yes, I know, the garden of Eden is still flat and the gates are closed.
But we have to give credit to Ken Ham's cranes. A few days ago, on the 15 June 2015 to be precise, the first bizo (a bent?) made of several dovetailed trees got erected by giant cranes which we all know were the tools that Noah used to build his Ark, in 3000 BC. Did I see some trusses made of welded steel as well, holding some biblical laminated wood together with J&M Chinese steel bolts and screws? Of course. Noah had a gigantic workshop, a viewing platform with amenities like restaurants, fast food outlets, elevators, bookshops, libraries, videoramas and loos for visitors. Impressive. Looking at the time it will take Ken Ham to build his Ark, one can imagine Noah struggling with a scythe, over several centuries. And Noah did it without any help nor cash... That really was a miracle...
Genesis 12 : 4. b : Then Noah went off on a big trip and delivered the animal pairs to their niches and the Galapagos turtles to their respective islands. And it felt good doing god's work

Back in 2014:

Australian Creationist Ken Ham is all over the press at the moment, given his upcoming debate with Bill Nye [the "Science Guy" — not a bloke, he is an American] about the relative merits of evolution. Ham hopes that the debate will help to generate funds and publicity for his current project: a replica of Noah’s Ark built to the exact specifications outlined in Genesis. However, that project now faces a new challenge from the British Museum and a 4,000-year old cuneiform tablet from Iraq.

Dr Irving Finkel of the British Museum came into possession of the tablet in 2009, via an acquaintance whose father had obtained it while serving in the Middle East. According to Finkel, the tablet contains a Babylonian version of the story of the flood, including details of a survivor who built an ark to house all of the animals “two by two.” As in Genesis, the tablet confirms the exact shape and dimensions of this boat, with one major difference: it is a round, raft-life vessel rather than the traditional ark envisaged by many, including Ham.

The existence of a Babylonian flood myth has been widely known since the late 19th century, but existing Babylonian writings did not include any details of the vessel used to rescue the animals. For Finkel, the two key differences here are that the key phrase “two by two” is used, and that the size and shape of the boat are precisely defined


Read more at http://guardianlv.com/2014/02/ken-ham-noahs-ark-plan-threatened-by-iraq/#IaHvsfsO2hXRdMX2.99
Two by two of course defines a piece of wood of undefined length with a 2 inch by 2 inch profile... In Aussieland the expression is shortened to "two-be-two"... The expression "thick as a four-be-two" means someone who is not quite the full quid. I guess our Ken Ham is cleverer than the average bear. There is a motza to be made from people's beliefs... NONE to be made from atheism... Zero... This is where I feel my brain power's affinity with the "thick as a four-be-two"... Darn... I missed my vocation of contortionist or that of extortionist. 

Gus Leonisky
Your local four-be-two expert.

 

a grave social debt...

Pope Francis has called on the world’s rich nations to begin paying their “grave social debt” to the poor and take concrete steps on climate change, saying failure to do so presents an undeniable risk to a “common home” that is beginning to resemble a “pile of filth”.

The pope’s 180-page encyclical on the environment, released on Thursday, is at its core a moral call for action on phasing out the use of fossil fuels.

But it is also a document infused with an activist anger and concern for the poor, casting blame on the indifference of the powerful in the face of certain evidence that humanity is at risk following 200 years of misuse of resources...

read more: http://www.theguardian.com/world/2015/jun/18/popes-climate-change-encyclical-calls-on-rich-nations-to-pay-social-debt

the ham in the atheist sandwich...

 

Generations of Christians indoctrinated with an atheistic worldview need to understand false religions like atheism to reach the lost with biblical truths, Answers in Genesis President Ken Ham says.

Atheism is NOT a religion. Atheism is the absence of religion and the absence of a godly creature.

"One religion that has grown in numbers and cultural significance is atheism," Ham posted on his Facebook page. "Now, why would we even call atheism a religion? (Answers in Genesis) points out that as a non-theistic religion, atheism is a belief system that attempts to explain everything in our world, including how the universe came to be and how one should relate to his fellow humans.

Atheism is NOT a religion. In order to live well, honestly and happy, humans do not need the illusion of religion.

"As such, it's a naturalistic, comprehensive worldview (as opposed to a supernatural one) often referred to as secular humanism. Generations of our young people, including many in our churches, have been educated in government-run schools in the religious view of naturalism, which in reality is atheism."

Understanding nature is NOT a religion. Understanding nature is being curious without pre-conceived dogma, without creating dogma and without morality. Understanding nature, including human nature provides us with an understanding of natural relationships and survival in our stylistic relationships, including secular relationships. 

At a time when the number of religiously unaffiliated Americans is on the rise, Ham says it's more important than ever for Christians to understand false religions, including non-theistic ones like atheism, because many have "grown in such significance that they have helped the culture lurch into increased secularization."

Secularization is not a belief system but the best way to manage survival in relationships, with a consideration of multiple points of views, including erroneous religious views. Atheism IS NOT a religion.

"And then armed with this helpful background, Christians can better reach secularized people with biblical truths, especially the saving gospel message," Ham says.

We do not need to be "armed" with erroneous and invented religious "truths" that dismiss reality or invent a parallel universe with bonus points. Most humans have moved on from the flat earth theory. 

Religions do not make sense. Their history, their dogma, the morality, the purpose, the immortality are all bogus. There is not an inkling of vibrant vision of reality mixing what-is with faith. The only thing you get by the stir is confused perceptions with illusion which might make one feel good and not apparently lost in a meaningless existentialism, but a meaningless existentialism it is nonetheless. 

And should we accept this existentialism, we can find many exhilarating experiences of being alive in a meaningless thrust to which we give purpose. This is our greater altruistic challenge. Believing in the illusion of god is easy.

A study released this week by the Pew Research Center found the percentage of Americans who say they believe in God has dropped from 92 percent in 2007 to 89 percent now. More than 62 percent of Americans say humans evolved over time, while 34 percent say people have always existed in their present form, the study found.

My oh my... 34 per cent of people still believe in the Eve and Adam's rib story? My hat to the spruikers of this stupidity.

In an article posted on the Answers in Genesis website, "Understanding a World of Beliefs," Ham and Mark Looy wrote that many Western nations, once very Christianized, are now secularized.

Secularity is not a sin: "They brought one. And He said to them, "Whose likeness and inscription is this?" And they said to Him, "Caesar's." And Jesus said to them, "Render to Caesar the things that are Caesar's, and to God the things that are God's." And they were amazed at Him.

Here, Mark 12:16 and 17 tells secularity very well: pay your taxes to Caesar, though Caesar is not god. And I am not amazed: God is a idea. Caesar had tax collectors.

"For Christians, it is instructive to understand the paradox that occurred in this shift: the key role that various religions played in the secularization of Western cultures," Ham and Looy wrote. "All Christians should make it a point to understand the other faiths and learn how to witness to their adherents."

Secularisation is not a faith. Secularisation is a unification factor of multiplicity of ideas, including eroneous religious view points which secularization needs to control. Secularisation of governing bodies is essential in the good functioning of complex groups with various views. Religions are ancient outdated mono-cultural view-points, erroneous in their understanding of reality. The only "paradox" is that religious beliefs still exist, in contradiction to the evidence of relative scientific investigation of what-is.

The key role that religions played in the secularization of Western cultures is simple: some people thought that they had enough crap from beliefs. Let's be human and be evolved (still evolving) animals from a long series of DNA changes. Our relationships can be managed efficiently without the illusion of the idea of god. Should we accept the evolved reality of life in which pain can be managed and plod can be decorated scientifically and stylistically, we can improve our lot as we grow, while minimising conflicts and increasing enjoyment of our individual ephemerality.

It's that easy. Simple. 

See story and toon at top

 

noah looses his tax break...

Kentucky has suspended the $18 million in state sales tax rebates to the Ark Encounter, saying it has violated the terms of the incentives approved by the state.

State officials notified the theme park in Williamstown in Grant County claiming it had violated an agreement with Kentucky by switching from for-profit to nonprofit company, according to the Courier-Journal.

A letter by the state Tourism, Arts and Heritage Cabinet noted that the park's owners on June 28 transferred the property from Ark Encounter LLC, a for-profit company, to Crosswater Canyon, a nonprofit subsidiary of Answers in Genesis, a Christian ministry that runs the Creation Museum in Petersburg. It said the switch was in violation of its agreement for the tax incentives.

"When they became a nonprofit entity, they became in breach of their contract," Laura Brooks at the Tourism, Arts and Heritage Cabinet told WHAS 11 News.

The property was transferred for $10.

Ark Encounter disagrees that it was in violation of the agreement.

read more:

http://www.christianpost.com/news/kentucky-suspends-ark-encounter-18-mil...

not built to god specifications...

Williamstown, Kentucky: It is one of the world's classic stories.

A gigantic ark gets built with the help of a higher power, a symbolic refuge from the depravity of humankind. It is a huge, grandiose structure constructed out of wood that is perhaps larger than anything comparable in the world. Then heavy rains begin to fall, inundating the earth around it.

And that's when the lawyers are called.

Ark Encounter, the multimillion-dollar theme park and monument to fundamentalist Christianity whose centrepiece is a giant replica of Noah's Ark, is suing its insurance carriers over rain-related damages on the property.

The company, Crosswater Canyon, is seeking to recoup what it says were $US1 million ($1.44 million) worth of damages, as well as attorneys fees and costs, and an unspecified amount of punitive damages.

The irony has not been lost on local media organisations and observers on social media. Even the American Atheists took a shot on Twitter.

This particular chapter begins in 2017, when rains came to northern Kentucky. They did not fall for 40 days and 40 nights this time.

According to the National Weather Service, on-and-off precipitation throughout the year dropped 100-130 centimetres of rain that year on Williamstown, the town where the theme park is located - just a slight bump above average.

But a slope abutting an access road near the east side of the theme park's ersatz ark began to fail in May, and eventually was subject to a "significant landslide" that took out a barrier along the road, according to the lawsuit.

The theme park reported the property damage to its insurance companies.

Engineers it hired recommended it replace the barrier with a retaining wall with drilled concrete shafts to prevent further damage, and the theme park also repaved and repaired portions of the road, the grading and added some drainage improvements. The total cost was about $US 1 million, the lawsuit says.

But the insurance companies denied claims for the improvements, saying that the policy had an exclusion for correcting design deficiencies or faulty workmanship.

 

 

Read more:

https://www.smh.com.au/world/north-america/lawyers-for-noahs-ark-theme-p...

 

 

Read from top. Ahahaha....

the dutch ham...

 

Now it’s Noah’s Ark that needs saving.

A Dutch replica of the biblical animal-rescuing ark has been held in the UK for 19 months because it is deemed unseaworthy — sparking a diplomatic spat and $700-a-day fines, according to a report.

The 230-feet long floating museum made a rare trip out of Holland in November 2019 to dock in Orwell Quay in Ipswich — where it was impounded by coastguard officers who refused to let it sail away, according to official documents obtained by the Ipswich Star.

“We do have concerns about this vessel and we cannot rely on the grace of God that it can be safely towed to Holland,” officials from the Maritime and Coastguard Agency wrote in the documents.

They cited the $3.7 million ark being 61 years old, as well as it lacking necessary certificates and information about its weight and stability, the report said.

So far, it has racked up a bill of more than $17,000 from being detained — with daily fines since April 1 now $700, the paper said.

The ark’s owner, Dutch TV producer Aad Peters, said that the vessel had been permitted to make previous trips because it is a “non-certified floating object” not required to comply with international regulations.

He has complained that he is now in an “impossible stalemate” where he is being fined for not leaving the UK — but also forbidden from setting sail.

The Dutch Government has been lobbying UK Transport Secretary Grant Shapps, as well as the UK’s Foreign, Commonwealth and Development Office, the report said.

“There is only one ark in the world, so let it go,” a former MP in Holland pleaded with UK counterparts, according to the paper.

Ipswich MP Tom Hunt said the diplomatic issue appears to have “hit a bit of a brick wall,” however.

 

Read more:

https://nypost.com/2021/06/10/noahs-ark-replica-faces-costly-dilemma-of-biblical-proportions/

 

Aad Peters is now the Dutch Ken Ham, an Australian loony with, we hope, a navigation certificate from god Himself for his own floating monster...

 

Read from top.

 

 

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